“When talking about himself, a gentleman should always mumble, use random emphasis and be virtually incoherent. This gives people a good excuse for not listening…” - a thought inspired by The Fast Show

The basics:

Carl Reuter, O.B.E.

He’s a singer, instrumentalist and composer. He plays rock ‘n roll jumpin’ blues. He was a cultural diplomat for thirty years but woke up one day and decided to live the dream.  He now lives on an island in the Adriatic. He has a hot one-man show. He travels. He entertains. His sound is unique and exciting. He somehow combines being eco-sympathetic with being an extreme petrolhead. No one knows how.

He doesn’t feel comfortable talking about himself, so the autobiography below is therefore deliberately written as an incoherent visual mumble. He politely invites readers to skip over much or all of it…

“Kenyaparentsgetdivorcewidehorizonsbitterarguments

multiplenewpartnersexcitementfatherbusydistantand

frighteningprivilegedmotherlong silencesand short

claustrophobicattentionloveofwildlifeabandonment

issuesNgonghillsLakeNaivashaMountLongonotAberdares

lonelyduringholidaysdogsasfriendsJoeytheparrothorses

SnowflakeandAngelinaangergrowsKarenhouseWaabeach

houseresentmentgrowscoralreefjealousyofotherswith

familiessnakessafariscampingtragedies:stepbrother

killedbycrocstepfatherdeadat53fromstrokeboarding

StMary’sKentonCollegeschooldisciplinetroubles

boxingrugbyshorttemper10speedracingbikeconstant

fightingscoutssenttoDarwenLancashiretolivewith

stepauntandunclefascinationwithcarsandmotorcycles

unhappyinukEastAfricanCoronationSafariRallyNakuru

racecircuitBrackenhursthillclimbsinsecurefirstguitar

for7^thbirthdayaggressivefather’sbluescollectionbeginning

ofalifetimeloveofplayingmusichormonalteensgood

academicresultsfatherrefusedtopayforuniversityplaceat

Cambridgethreeyearsofsalesandmarketingwork

didn’tspeaktofatherforfouryearsrevelledinchaotic

independencedifficultworkyearsbeforeuniversity

universityasindependentstudent4yearstofirstdegree

atSouthamptonalwaysbrokeplayed infirstbands

developedsolobluesactseveralcarandmotorcycle

accidentsteachingjobPoolecontinuingangermanagement

issuesteachingjobuniversityofBariItalymovetoBritish

CouncilHongKongmarriagetofirstwifeMastersdegree

atReadingBritishCouncilGreeceBritishCouncilAbu

DhabiBritishCouncilHQLondonBritishCouncilCairo

firstwiferanoffwithsomeoneelseoutoftheblueshock

periodofrelationshipchaosandthensurprisingsense

of reliefspectaculardesertmarriagetolifepartnerMejrema

stresslevelsincreasinginlinewithpromotionsBritish

CouncilRomeculturaldiplomacyquestionsBritishCouncil

KuwaitincreasingfeelingthatI’dtakenawrongturn

somewherePashathecatbuilthouseonbeautifulDalmatian

islandBritishCouncilBangladeshBritishCouncilLibya

healthproblemsagainkeptthemusicgoingfirstalbum

NewBlues2003charityconcertsweekendgigsandparties

regularsongwritingstresslevelsthroughtheroofleft

itallbehindOBEfromHMtheQueenmovedtoDalmatia

happilygaveupdiplomat’ssalaryprivilegesandsecurity

decompressionphasewrotenewsongsboughtandlearned

recordingequipmentsetupstudioproducednewCDcalled

KingoftheOneManBlueslivegigswhenIfeellikeitArkos

DolphinboatlargemotorcycleequippedLandRoveroffroad

rallytripssearchforwildplacesandallthat’sjustphaseone.”